"Megan? Did you hear what I said?" (I nod.) (Five second delay.) (Then I shake my head.)
"Megan is a good student but needs to pay a little more attention in class."
"Did you do the minutes of that meeting?" (I answer affirmatively.) (I then seek out another attendee to fill in the blanks of my notes.)
I'm a daydreamer.
As a child, a teenager, an adult, a professional, a mum, a wife - I've spent my life living half in this world and half in one of my own.
Of course, this has its hindrances.
It's frustrating for others who think I'm there with them, when I'm really only there physically. Many times each day someone will attempt a conversation with me and I'll have to pretend I was listening to the beginning of the story. Steve will talk about something that was just on television, something we're both watching, and I'll have no idea what he's talking about. My eyes are looking at the screen but my ears are switched off and my thoughts are far, far away.
(Sometimes I wonder if this is why my memory seems so bad - I remember the things I was there for, but when my mind switches over that's the end of any chance of remembering that moment/book/movie.)
I've had to be very conscious of this recently. Someone spoke to me about Mindfulness, and I realised that's what I needed to practice - being fully present when I'm with others or even by myself at times. If I'm playing with my daughter, I need to be there playing with her. If I'm eating a meal with my family, I need to just be there.
It's helped with my state of mind, making me happier in my reality rather than escaping to dreamland all the time. And it's a bit more satisfying for my husband, daughter and friends; it makes me better able to connect with them, and them with me.
Now, I concentrate on being there. Just being in the moment.
Oh, but I do still daydream. I love that in my writing life, daydreaming is just part of the job description. Staring out the window and dreaming things up is not a distraction; it's a necessity. And perhaps it is that, the permission I give myself to drift away at times, that frees me up the rest of the time.
I love to daydream, to see where my mind takes me. I just do it a little less often these days.