I'm tired of mediocrity.
I want to teach my daughter that life is more important than a career.
That when you’re asked what you want to be, you don’t have to answer with a job title.
I want to show her that you need to work hard, but not necessarily in a traditional sense.
To follow her heart and let it take her to high heights.
I want to show her that she can achieve extraordinary things.
I want her to know that risks are hers for the taking.
And so are adventures.
But how am I to show her that?
No matter how well I do at things, everything I try is so damned mediocre.
Not crazy or all-consuming.
Never risky or extreme.
Just so standard. Boring. Suburban.
I want my daughter to know she can reach for the extraordinary.
But then I'm torn - right now she doesn't want amazing.
She just wants to be. And to be loved. That, she has.
Megan, I love this post! It's so hard to balance the reality of raising a family with a desire for adventure and a life well-lived. From where I sit, you're modelling anything but mediocrity for your beautiful little miss. Sit tight - you never know what great adventure is waiting for you just around the corner. xx
ReplyDeleteWe all want the best for our children. Its our job to set the right foundation for them to build on. Its our job to encourage the fact that they can do and be anything they want to be. No limitations. We never want to stifle dreams and break their spirit. We can learn a lot from our children and we in turn need to nurture their confidence to believe their dreams can come true!
ReplyDelete"But how am I to show her that?"
ReplyDeleteBy encouraging her in everything she wants to try, no matter what it might be.
And buy the Dr Seuss book, "Oh The Places You'll Go" and read it to her often.
Love this post, Megan.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same and struggle with how I will teach them to dream and reach for things when I feel like I don't do much of anything well and I put aside my dreams for various reasons.
Wanting the best for our children and wanting them to have the world is what we all want. But happiness is mainly what we really mean. At the moment Popps wants to be a hair dresser, fine by me, could come in quite handy one day. Sure I would love for her to be something truly amazing....but I actually think that already.
ReplyDeleteYou know what?
ReplyDelete"To be loved" and to be happy...is success in my books.
What more do you need?
And kids do need modelling, of course, but they turn out to be their own little...and eventually big....people regardless of what we do.
They are who they are.
Knowing that takes some of the pressure off...I hope. xx
Beautifully written M. I feel this way all the time, especially when I think about what my 16 year old self would think if she could see who I am now. Mediocrity was the thing I was scared of most at that age and I too feel that I'm keenly mediocre. I'm not scared of trying I just don't know what I could actually do that's extraordinary. Maybe my extraordinary is to love these small people more than I ever thought possible? As for you, I don't think you're mediocre at all. You put words around things I feel in beautiful ways and live and love in a truly real way and that is not at all mediocre, it's wonderful.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree more - I often think I learn more from her than she does from me... in a good way!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Karen. I always admire how you balance your dreams with your family. x
ReplyDeleteOne of my all-time favourite books! It's makes me cry every time I read the line "Kid, you'll move mountains" to her.
ReplyDeleteIt's a strange struggle isn't it - it's so wonderful to put other people first and focus entirely on your kids, but at the same time you wonder about this other side of things. I wish I had the answer.
ReplyDeleteI feel that way all the time too.... But as Cat says, I think you are anything but mediocre! Your writing and way with words is a gift, a rare talent that you are brave enough to develop and explore. There is NOTHING mediocre about that.
ReplyDeleteYou are a fantastic mother, this I know for sure. If other mothers (including me!) spent half the time nuturing their children and taking an interest in their development... well, the world would be a very different place. You are raising such a bright, outgoing and independant girl and I do not doubt that she is going to achieve great things... because she is just like you.
What A needs from you most of all right now is unconditional love and acceptance. With that she will have the confidence to go where she wants to go, to walk the unknown, to journey the world xx
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely - and I don't want to sound like I'm going to pressure her to be a rocket scientist or anything, I just have this weird feeling that I spout on about being able to do anything, and yet I don't live that myself.
ReplyDeleteI definitely try to think of 'extraordinary' in different ways these days too, but sometimes I lose that ability. I said to Steve the other day, let's sell up and travel for two years, before we have to settle Abbey into school. If he'd said yes, or even maybe, I'd be booking airline tickets right now... but then, security is a big thing in life too. A big thing to give up. SIGH!
ReplyDeleteI'm just being greedy, really!
ReplyDeleteSo true Christie - and I absolutely believe that's the best gift we can give her. I just get extra greedy some days... ;)
ReplyDeleteI am struck by two things reading this Megan.
ReplyDeleteONE: you are ANYTHING but mediocre.
TWO: for your daughter to know instinctively to "just be" is as AMAZING as it gets. We as grown ups 'unlearn' the ability to 'just be' and deny the importance of it all together.
Megan you are DOING an amazing job and your daughter is EXTRAORDINARY.
Please know that.
xx
Beautiful post Megan. A will know that the extraordinary is possible because you are her mum! As for you, in my opinion - we all feel like this at times and need to just keep moving forward because really, there is so much extrodinary in the everyday ordinary. xx
ReplyDeleteI can very much relate to this. I feel this when I look at my two girls and then am gripped with my own aversion to risk and lack of confidence. I don't think I wasn't always like this; definitely not as a young child. But life and circumstances have a way of squeezing that brave, carefree, adventurous part out of us. Then I wonder if I'm searching too much for something illusively "WOW" that I fail to see or make most of "the amazing" that might be staring me in the face. What does "not mediocre" look like anyway? Along Louisa's comment, I was reminded of this quote I really like: "You need to let the ordinary things that would ordinarily bore you suddenly thrill you." - Andy Warhol. I dont have the answers; just some things to keep pondering for now.
ReplyDeleteI heard someone speak the other day - he asked something like "Do you have the courage to let your child be who she wants to be and follow her own path?" If you do then that is a gift for your child, I think.
ReplyDeleteAnd 'mediocre' is a mind-trick because it is always a subjective judgement, so I would say let go of the thought of anything being 'mediocre' - it's just a voice in your head trying to push you forward towards your dreams, or push you back in your box (depending on your mood).
And your daughter will have so many dreams, so many she won't even tell you ... and you are right, I reckon, mostly she will just want to be and be loved, even when she is reaching for her own stars xx
Wow - I have never reflected on the 'expected' response to "what do you want to be?"
ReplyDeleteFulfilled, challenged and inspired.
But also content, balanced and needed.
:-)
With unconditional love, through the ups and the downs and some resilience, children can be whatever they wish. Their dreams may not be our dreams, I'll be happy if they are happy whatever they choose to do. When Miss 15 was 3, she wanted to clean monkeys bottoms at the zoo (she thought the baboons pink bottoms were sore), a friend said well that's no aspiration you should stop her saying that. .... I never stopped Miss 3 as she talked about her passion of monkey bums, she was happy and so was I. Nx
ReplyDeleteIt's not mediocrity. I grew up in impoverished situations and I was still quite adventurous, living in several countries on my own, finding the means to do so given our financial situation. It's about what you teach your child, reaching for the stars and all that, being supportive and loving :)
ReplyDeleteLove that quote Veronica! Thanks for sharing those lovely words.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your always wise words, Yvette. I love the concept of being courageous enough to let her be who she wants to be. x
ReplyDeleteI love that, Nathalie! Shows how caring your girl is - and what a great mum you are. x
ReplyDeleteOh, I know just what you mean, Megan...This post really resonated with how I am feeling at the moment. But your last line was really important...She just wants to be. That's important, that's a feeling we can learn from kids, I think.
ReplyDeleteI haven't stopped by for ages, I've been falling behind with blogging. I'm glad this was the first post of yours that I have read in a while. Loved it
BEST book EVER!
ReplyDeleteWow. Nail. Head. Bang. Awesome post!
ReplyDelete