Ladies who Lunch

It seems so extravagant, doesn't it? Lunching mid-week, sans children.

Back when I worked in an office, lunches out were not an uncommon occurrence. At first, I would watch on as management headed out to lunch and be silently disapproving as I noticed the time while taking phone messages for them.

Then, when I became one of them, I took every opportunity to do the same. Could I spare the time to head out for oysters and wine over a chat? Sure. And then I'd panic three hours later when I still had a page-long to-do list.

When I had Abbey, lunching was a good way to catch up with friends, our babies - or, at least, their babies - sleeping peacefully all the while.

These days, going out for lunch with toddler in tow is best done at a park. Or when she's in childcare.

Because really, what's the point of working for yourself if you can't indulge in a long lunch every now and then?

Today I'm joining in with Fat Mum Slim's Point and Shoot. Head over and check out the other posts.

Ten Years Today

I remember.

Putting in the offer, so scared of such a huge commitment, a seemingly enormous debt.

Sitting in the cafe that used to be our favourite spot, getting that phone call. It's ours!

Walking past, driving past, every day before settlement. It's ours!

Moving in, being so proud of having our very own place.

The party that celebrated us buying our home and our engagement. All our friends and family were here.

Opening our wedding gifts in that room, right there.

Spending weekends painting, gardening, making this home ours.

Sitting outside in the evenings, so relieved to be home from work and back in the hills.

Watching the owls, kookaburras and parrots nest in the gum trees, fly down to our decking and watch us.

Friends coming to stay, when their own houses were being worked on.

Coming home from holidays, always so relieved to be back. There's nothing like coming back home.

Finding out I was pregnant with Abbey - I was right over there, then I told Steve in that spot just there.

Decorating our baby's room, life so full of promise.

Looking out over our garden and seeing how much the plants have grown. That tree, I was given for my 21st birthday. Those flowers, when Abbey was born.

Friends and family coming over, so many dinners and lunches and breakfasts and drinks and nights chatting. So many laughs, so many good times.

Seeing our little girl run in the backyard, chasing the chickens, and all of them being chased by the dog. Oh, the laughter.

Today marks ten years in our home.

Ten years. One whole decade.

I've shared a lot about our home recently, as we change it from a small house perfect for a couple to a less-small home for our family. I'm proud of what we've done with our house.

It's our home, and we've always been happy here.

They say home is where the heart is. This is a house filled with love and great times. And there's nowhere I'd rather be than here with Steve and Abbey.

I'm Loving... Quick Snaps

My new love goes by the name of Instagram - a free iPhone app that's all about taking snaps of your day. Here are some I've shared so far...

(If you're on Instagram, you can find me by searching for MeganBlandford.)

10 Tips: Writing a Book Review

In case you hadn't noticed, I've written a lot of book reviews in the last year. A lot.

Most of them are for kids' books, for all ages: baby board books, older picture books, beginner readers' chapter books, junior novels, and young adult books. (You can see them all over at Kids Book Review.) And also some adult books, both novels and non-fiction. (They're over here at Australian Women Online.)

When I wrote my first review for Kids Book Review, I had no idea what to do. Should a review be in a certain format? How long should it be? What sorts of things should I say?

I did what we all do these days when we want an answer to something: I turned to Google. What I found was that there was no 'right' or 'wrong' way to review a book.

So I decided to turn to Plan B: make it up as I went along.

Here are some of the things I've learnt along the way:

1. Write to a length that suits you. If you're a brief writer, don't try to force yourself to babble on, and if you tend to write in long, flowing sentences, then do that. Your review can be 200 words or 1,000 words - as long as it tells us what we want to know, it will work well.
2. Make your introduction attention-grabbing. As with any piece of writing, if you want anyone to read the entire thing you need to attract their attention. Make your first line a little teaser, or a brief personal opinion that will make your reader want to know more.
3. Be detailed. Tell us what the story is about, without giving away any endings. When I read a review, I want to know what it's all about and I want to know more than the sentence on the blurb.
4. Be a little bit formal. Talk about structure, format, voice, style, and so on. Even if you only touch on some of these things, it will give your readers an idea of whether this book is something they want to read.
5. Make it personal. As well as talking about the storyline and the formal bits, tell us what you think. Did the book move you? Did you cry? Did you read it in one sitting? Or did you struggle your way through it? I really believe the best reviews are the personal ones.
6. Include pictures. Yes, people really do judge books by their covers, so they want to see the cover image in your review. If it's a picture book and you can gain access to any other images, include those as well.
7. Take your time. When you're doing a high quantity of book reviews it can be easy to rush through them. Avoid this temptation. Take the time to do the book justice.
8. Be honest, and be fair. If you loved every word of the book, tell us that. Sometimes you'll need to provide some criticism, though - don't be rash about it; remember that this is someone's baby. Be honest but fair.
9. Provide some basic details. Title, author, publisher, age bracket or target audience; these are the basic things we all want to know.
10. Send a link to the publisher and author. Don't expect them to find their way to you, and don't assume that one will send it to the other. If you can find contact details for either or both, then send them a quick email letting them know you've reviewed their book. 

Good luck with writing your book reviews. Let me know how you go!

If you write reviews, do you have any other tips?

I Say Hello

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"Hello!" she said with a smile. The lady at the checkout looked up. "Hello," she replied, with no smile. She scanned the items, as two-year-old Abbey watched. "Hello! Hello! Hello!" she said again, waving more and trying to catch the lady's eye. The woman looked steadfastly at each item being scanned. The lady behind me in the queue spoke up. "Excuse me, the little girl is saying hello to you."

"I know," replied the checkout lady. "But I already said hello."

Hello: a word whose dictionary definition doesn't come close to describing its real meaning. Sure, it's a greeting. But it's more than that.

It's a word recognised right around the globe, a word that will bring an instant smile to (most) faces both familiar and unfamiliar.

A small word that carries so much weight. "Hello!" - it can be bold and cheerful. "Hello?" - a question of uncertainty. "Hello" - a cheerful reply that can so easily regain confidence in a friendship or forge a new relationship.

It's a word full of promise. The beginning of an interaction, a conversation that could uncover anything. The beginning of a friendship.

And to this child - to my daughter - it is a word of security. Since she first learnt to speak, she has used this word as a gauge of people's feelings. When she's told off, she'll look in my eyes and say "Hello Mummy?" - her way of saying, "Is everything okay?" And I'll look back at her and say with a smile, "Hello, Abbey." And everything is good in her world.

She will walk through the shops saying hello to lots of people. And I wonder what she thinks when they don't respond.

Hello. A simple word that carries so much meaning. A word that does not, and should not, have limits to it.

And... She's Back

Running, that is.

I floundered a little in the middle of week three of C25K, stopping after I got a little bit sick, but I really think I needed to take things a bit easier and have some rest. I needed to be kind to myself.

I'm feeling stronger again now.

My need to get back into a solid exercise routine hit me while I was away camping recently. One afternoon I had that familiar feeling of being overwhelmed and over everything, with lots of negative thoughts swirling in my head. I dragged myself to the river.

Swimming against a strong current, using it like a lap pool, I swam as hard as I could. When I stopped, I felt alive.

I was re-energised, and I felt great.

It was that afternoon that I felt ready to come home again, ready to live my life; then that I realised I would be okay.

Exercise has, for years, been an important part of my life. It gives me the energy and the frame of mind to keep up with myself and all the things I want - and need - to achieve. It helps me see places I never thought I'd be able to go to; it makes me believe in myself.

I needed to be reminded of that.

Now, I'm back to running - or, I should say, building up the fitness to run. I'm also walking more regularly again, and doing my strength exercises every morning.

I'm back baby.

10 Tips: Camping With Toddlers

Camping with toddlers? I hear you ask. Are you crazy?

Well, no. Okay, maybe kind of crazy, but bear with me here.

Steve and I have been camping for years, and we were keen to keep up this tradition when Abbey was born. So keen, in fact, that her first camping trip was at six weeks of age - which is actually the easiest age to take a child away, before they can move around.

To be honest, the hardest time to camp with her was last year when she was a year old. It can be difficult while a child is crawling or walking unsteadily, and too young to understand a lot of instruction - although it is doable and can still be enjoyable.

I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but our most recent camping trip showed me that a two-year-old is an absolute pleasure to take camping. Old enough to understand some dangers and listen to instruction, but too young to attempt to explore too far. Perfect.

And kids love camping. They love it.

Here are some tips to help you make camping with a toddler a safe and enjoyable experience...

1. Pack appropriately. Now is the time to visit your nearest op-shop or cheap clothing store and grab a couple of t-shirts and shorts, gumboots and thongs; not beautiful dresses and expensive sandals. Think comfort and things you don't care about if they're torn or stained.
2. Put together a first-aid kit. Include things for a variety of possibilities: cuts, stings, temperatures, and so on, and make sure there are things for both adults and children.
3. Know the dangers. It's a fact of camping that there are dangers around for kids - campfires, a river or the ocean, cooking facilities, cars, animals - and you need to know what they are and how to either avoid them or reduce the risk.
4. Give specific boundaries. Rather than saying 'don't go too close to the fire', make a clear boundary that your child is not to cross. This takes away any room for doubt, and makes things safer and easier to monitor.
5. Always make sure your child is supervised. Especially if you're in a group, it can be easy to assume that 'someone' is watching out for your child. But don't assume. If you're doing something else or leaving the campsite, specifically ask one person to watch your child.
6. Forget the dirt. It's inevitable that your child will get dirty when camping. Give them a wash at the end of the day, before bed, but until then just ignore it. It'll make your life easier, and your days more relaxing.
7. Don't underestimate a child's ability to entertain themselves. Take a few small toys as a backup or for some quiet play in the evenings, but for the most part let your child explore. It's amazing how much fun a child can have with dirt, sticks, water and space to run. I'm yet to hear a child say they're bored while camping.
8. Stick to some routine. Using the same bedtime routine (for example bath, teeth, story, bed) will help make your toddler feel more comfortable about their new surroundings. If your toddler still naps during the day, factor this time into your plans (and don't be surprised if a non-nap-taker changes their tune - all that activity and fresh air can tire them out pretty quickly!).
9. Think about facilities. If your toddler is toilet trained, or being toilet trained, you might like to consider taking either a potty or a special toilet seat for them. Where we go camping, there are only drop toilets... and I'm not putting my two-year-old on one of those!
10. Use it as a fun way of learning. Camping is an opportunity to see new things, whether it's wildlife, a different environment or new experiences, and toddlers will be amazed by them all. Point things out, talk about them and watch those little faces light up in awe.

Have fun, relax and revel in these moments with your toddler. 

Cook: The Easiest Roast Chicken in the World

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Do you ever buy a roast chicken from the supermarket? You know, just for an easy meal or to shred for a salad or a soup or the like?

I don't.

Because I have a way to cook my own - and it's easier, quicker, cheaper, healthier and yummier than buying one pre-cooked. I cook chicken this way to make soups and salads, or to go in rolls or on pizzas. For the three of us, it will often do two meals.

Here's how:

Easy Roast Chicken

1 whole chicken

1 lemon

dried thyme

Preheat oven to 200 degrees Celcius.

Cut the chicken right down the backbone, then place it in a lined baking dish and press down to flatten it.

Sprinkle with thyme.

Cut the lemon into rounds and lay across the top of the chicken.

Cook in the oven for 35 to 40 minutes.

Enjoy!

How simple is that?

Why do we label our children?

We talked to her as we drove, practicing what she should say when we arrived. She replied enthusiastically: 'Yeah! Yay!'  while Steve and I muttered to each other, 'Sure, but she'll probably act all shy when we get there and not say a word.' Then I heard some talking from the backseat, quiet this time. I turned to see her, head down and saying 'Bit shy. Abbey's a bit shy.' We were a little shocked, and encouraged her some more and told her there was no need to be shy. 

When we arrived, she ran to her grandfather with her arms open and yelled, 'Happy birthday Opi!'

Sometimes you have these eye-opening moments as a parent, where everything suddenly makes sense. When you realise that every word you utter is heard. Despite the fact that she might be playing elsewhere, or chatting to herself or being noisy, she actually hears everything. And she understands.

Abbey is not a shy child, not by any stretch of the imagination. She never has been. She will run up to strangers without any qualms, introducing herself and chatting away like she's known them forever. She will run into a room and make herself at home straight away. She will take a child's hand and ask them to play, as though they're best friends. From the first day I took her to childcare, she turned and waved at me, saying ‘Bye Mummy!’

She is not a child prone to cuddling into me, or easing into things, or holding my hand uncertainly – in fact, there’s almost nothing worse in her mind. This is a girl who will run straight into any situation, with such confidence and enthusiasm that I am constantly amazed.

But recently, she started showing signs of developing some shyness. Someone would talk to her and she'd cuddle into me, hiding her face. I would explain to the person: 'She's been a bit shy lately'. And so, she wouldn't have to respond, to say hello nicely or answer a question. 'That's okay,' they'd say, 'she's shy'. And I'd nod and give my little girl a cuddle.

But then we realised the effect this was having on her. We came to understand that the labels we placed on her were doing more harm than good. It had become an excuse.

I was a shy child, and can at times be a shy adult, and I know plenty of children who are naturally shy. So I understood this feeling of shyness, or at least I thought I did. But then I realised, this is not about me, and this is not about other kids. This is about Abbey. This is about giving her the freedom to be her own person.

What she needed was encouragement, to be made to feel comfortable with being herself.

Lesson learnt.

No more labels.

Renovation Reveal: Abbey's Bedroom

Time for another room reveal... this time one of my favourite rooms in the house, Abbey's new bedroom.

It's such a beautiful space: big and bright, and with the newly painted walls, freshly polished floors and new furniture it just feels so fresh. Full of promise - just like its little occupant.

It's been so much fun decorating this room. Abbey's previous bedroom (which is now being converted into an office) was done when I was pregnant, so it was all very unisex. Buying all these gorgeous things and turning this into a room for a little girl has been fun.

Let me show you around...

From the doorway. Yes, the room has
its own little entranceway!

This beautiful embroidery, made for Abbey
by Cat of Wouldn't it be Loverly
resides in the entrance.

As does this gorgeous photo of Abbey and Taylor taken during
our shoot with Lou Lou Portraits last year.

Another step in reveals...

... this gorgeous height chart from
mooo.com.au.

Then there is the full-length mirror (from IKEA)
and the wardrobe...

... which consists of two lots of shelving (no need for a
chest of drawers) and hanging space.

Inside the bedroom (Abbey says "Oh wow! A pretty rug!").

And this big window looking out over
the front garden...

... adorned by whimsical birds from Paperklip Design...

... and Roman Blinds.

Looking back towards the entrance.

Tepee made by Steve and I, using a
pattern from Childhood 101.

My baby's going into a big bed!

The toy shelves are from IKEA.

A big, bare wall space, to be filled with a specially designed
set of wall stickers and revealed... soon!

What do you think?

Camping: Love or Loathe?

I love camping. It's not unusual for Steve and I to crave a camping trip, or to take off on a Friday evening for a quick weekend away (although it didn't happen too much last year, because of a certain major renovation).

But I do understand why a lot of people don't enjoy it. So many people ask why? when I talk about going camping, and I get it. I really do. It can be a lot of work, it's dirty and absent from many modern day comforts.

This time, especially, I needed it. I really needed a break. And it worked: I've come back feeling happy, positive, and ready for whatever this year throws at me. I'm ready to face everything.

Here's what I love about camping...


♥ It's a chance to get away, at a moment's notice, without spending any money.

♥ It gets us away from everything - phones, computers, work, house, worries. Everything.

♥ It's back to basics. All that matters are food, shelter and water - that's it.

♥ The food tastes amazing. Rarely do we eat basic camping meals like sausages or chops. No. We make roasts, curries, stirfries with fresh vegies, soups, and beautiful desserts. And the taste of lovely meals, when cooked on the fire and eaten in the middle of nowhere, is amazing.

♥ It's a time to connect, with no distractions. Rather than sitting in front of the television at night, you're sitting by a campfire chatting. Instead of having to race around, you can play with your child undistracted.

♥ It's fun - swimming, driving, walking, reading, relaxing. Just the simple things.

♥ It's travel, seeing and experiencing new things.

♥ It's good for the soul.

I love it.

Tell me - what do you love or loathe about camping?

See You Soon

Remember my most recent attempt to go camping? (I ranted about it here.)

This time, we're driving straight to our favourite camping spot. We will not be tempted by other, new places with threats of being bogged or attempting wild river crossings. We're heading directly here...

... to set up camp, be away from everything, swim in the river, explore the high country that we love so much, and just spend time together.

Meanwhile, the floorboards through our whole house are being polished!

See you again soon.

The Toilet Experience

weeeeeee!

I should tell you that I'm a prude, and very opposed to talking about ones and twos. Not just on my blog, but in life. I don't like toilet talk.

So toilet training Abbey has been an interesting experience.

You see, teaching a toddler to use a toilet involves facing up to the fact that sometimes these things need to be talked about. Here's how it's all happened for us...

• Endless explanations are the first step, and involve talking to the toddler about what happens on the toilet, step by step. How does one know when to go? Why do some stand and others sit? What's toilet paper for? And why shouldn't an entire roll be played with? What about flushing - why shouldn't she press that button every five seconds? Why do I squeal when she tries to press said button while I'm still sitting there? And why can't hands be washed with an entire bottle of liquid soap? All of this is actually lots of fun.*

• I like to use books to cover any topic that needs explaining, but really, this might be going a bit far. Especially when the requests to read these books are so constant. We read one book about toilet training (Time to Pee by Mo Willems) whilst Abbey sat on the potty. It was kind of fun.**

• Three days of constant watching, hovering with a potty nearby at all times, was involved. We were housebound, talking about toileting constantly. And the ensuing frustration when we turned our back for two seconds and the floor scored again (thank goodness we have floorboards!) was almost unbearable. It was great to have that family time, though.***

• Eventually, bribery incentives came into play. Despite my best intentions, and being convinced that my little girl would be happy to do what she was being taught just for the pure pleasure of seeing her Mum happy, I resorted to stickers. This didn't work - she knew she could have stickers anytime, so why go to all that effort for one little sticker? We then resorted to the lowest common denominator: lollies. Let me just say that I'm against little ones having lollies - I don't believe they need all that colouring and sugar, and I've worked hard to keep her from eating them in the past - but, well, I made an exception.**** And it worked.

It only took three and a half days for her to get the concept, though, which in all seriousness was great. We were, and still are, so proud of her. We can now go out without nappies (except at night) and she doesn't even expect bribery incentives anymore.*****


* It's fun for toddlers, or adults who like spending enormous amounts of money on toilet paper and soap, or having their bum flushed on.
** It was fun for Abbey, who wasn't sitting there thinking of all the other things she'd rather be doing instead of reading books about toilets.
*** I'm lying. I can think of much better ways to spend family time together than sitting at home talking about, and cleaning up, wee and poo.
**** That is, I became a hypocrite. Actually, no, I subscribed to that old parenting adage of Whatever Works.
***** This means that I actually just try to distract her when she's demanding lollies everytime she goes.