Blogopolis scribblings

This weekend I attended Blogopolis - a conference for bloggers of all genres. Gathering at Federation Square here in Melbourne were around 300 people who blog about parenting, lifestyle, photography, food, craft, fashion, technology, business, and more.

Events like this are exciting, overwhelming, inspiring, fun and exhausting. It was a big day - and here's how it all happened, from my perspective...

The day

Melbourne has never been more beautiful - the sun shining on Flinders Street station in the morning, and a rainbow framing Federation Square in the evening. So lovely for all the interstate visitors to see our wonderful city at its best.

The people

What does a blogging conference look like?

A room packed with people who just 'get' what you do - and where talk of RSS feeds, social media, blogging platforms, sponsored posts and community building is the norm.

Meeting bloggers I'd never come across before; putting faces to the names of those I've chatted to on Twitter and whose blogs I've read; seeing the familiar faces of those I'd met before; strangers who offer you a charger when your iPhone turns to black - there is friendliness everywhere you turn at a blogging conference.

The tweets

The funniest thing at these events is the technology and multi-tasking happening. While listening intently to a speaker, watching their presentation slides and reading the screens showing the steady stream of tweets, many of us were tweeting / blogging / photo-sharing on our iPhones / laptops / iPads.

With iPhone in hand all day, I was among the crowd of tweeters, sharing my opinions and conference notes with others reading along.

In fact, I tweeted so much that my name trended in Melbourne!

The information

There were seven sessions at Blogopolis, each giving various speakers the chance to share the knowledge they've gained throughout their time as bloggers. Here is a very brief summary of each:

1. Tools of the Trade

Much information was shared about feeds, platforms, technological gadgets and social media tools - all very technical really, and a session I struggled to get into. I did get a bit ranty on Twitter about the whole Wordpress versus Blogger discussion though!

2. Blog Photography

This session was quite focused on general photography tips - composition, point of view, lighting, things like that. Equipment was discussed with a small discussion about what you need to take great pictures for your blog, with the consensus being it's all about technique and not so much about fancy cameras.

Whether you use your phone camera or the best DSLR, always remember your photos are part of your blog voice so have fun with them.

3. Improving Blog Content

Christie from Childhood101 echoed my sentiments about blog content - quality over quantity. The key to long term blogging is fitting it in with your life and getting your priorities sorted, and if that means posting less each week then so be it.

I also loved Nikki from Styling You's comment that a blog is all about personality and voice, so let yours shine through.

4. Working with Brands

Some really interesting information about brands and their views of social media. Many corporates are still asking 'what's a blog?' but most of those who have got on board have been thrilled with the reach and recognition blogs have brought their brands.

As noted above, blogging is all about personality and voice - and that remains true when it comes to collaborating with businesses. Jaclyn Ely from Ikon Communications gave us her top tips for working with brands: know your style, know your audience, understand the brief and what the brand wants to achieve, stay honest, and go the extra mile to make it work.

5. Editorial vs. Advertorial

This was a discussion about incorporating sponsored posts into blog content, and about payment. The overwhelming message from this session was to know your value - bloggers are influential and valuable to brands, and that isn't something to be taken lightly. Don't let yourself be taken for granted.

Although all the panelists were interesting, I would have liked to see a lower profile blogger on the panel to give some balance and perspective. Although a highly successful blogging businessperson can expect large payments, that doesn't mean that's where it's at for many of us. And judging by the reaction when I tweeted that opinion, lots of other attendees agreed with me.

6. Blog Branding and Marketing

Darren from Problogger's session was a highlight for me - a great speaker and full of valuable information.

Darren said that the key to a successful blog is to try new things and evolve. In his words: "Experiment, tweak. Repeat."

When it comes to readers, he suggested the best focus is on current readers as opposed to constantly trying to reach new audiences. Look after your readers, take interest in them and enjoy the connections.

We heard a story from Darren's life as a work-at-home-dad, too. His son, upon being told his dad was 'talking to the world' on the computer said, "Tell them something important". A wise sentiment for bloggers.

7. The Australian Blogosphere

Nicole from Planning With Kids led an interesting discussion about the blogosphere - past, present and future. All agreed that this is a turning point for bloggers and that it's all taking off in Australia. Exciting!

The inspiration

There were lots of promotional items being handed out (except from me... I had business cards printed and didn't hand out one. I just feel like a bit of an idiot giving people my card!) but one stood out. When I saw them I had to have one.

SPEAK: such a simple message, but anyone who's read Lori's blog knows how important it is. A strong and powerful reminder - speak your truth.

There were lots of great speakers, but the one who inspired me most was Darren from Problogger. A great presenter with loads of blogging information - but not once did he utter the words 'should' or 'must'. Being given information, other perspectives and advice to tailor to your own blog is what these events are all about for me.

"Inform, inspire, interact" - Darren's words and a great summary of blogging.

The message

I began blogging with one clear aim: to write. That's it.

But the one thing that keeps me blogging, even when I experience blocks, fears and uncertainty with my other writing, is a connection. Connecting with other bloggers, readers, commenters, online friends.

The message I came away with was that while it's still about writing, it's really about connecting.

And I thank you for giving me that.

Art gallery? Children? How ridiculous!

Yesterday we headed into the city for a dose of culture - an art gallery.

I'm not really the art gallery type. I agreed to go to a couple overseas, but only to see big famous paintings, and I'd only been to the big gallery here in Melbourne once (and that was on a school excursion years ago).

It certainly wasn't something I had thought of doing with a young child.

That was until I was planning a meet-up with Zoey, a blog friend from interstate. I looked online for a child-friendly cafe and when I didn't have much luck (lots say they are, but all they mean is they have a kids' menu), I started to think about an activity we could do. Planning in advance at this time of year in Melbourne means an indoor activity is best - you never know what the weather will do.

The Kids' Space at the National Gallery of Victoria kept popping up on my searches. So we gave it a shot.

Sometimes I forget how easily pleased my daughter is - she's interested in anything and everything and is very fun to sightsee with. The drive into the city was filled with I-Spy (a colours version, and a game I'm on the verge of regretting teaching her as she now wants to play it ALL THE TIME!), and the short walk from our car park to the gallery was an exciting adventure for her in itself.

"Look Mummy, a tram!" "An asberrance (ambulance)!" "Mummy, Mummy, look at the water!" (That was the fountains outside the gallery, shown above.) "What's that?" (The water wall, below, which intrigued her.)

The Kids' Space itself was great. The current exhibition there is Colour - perfect for Abbey's age and her keen interest in colours and shapes. She happily spent a couple of hours looking around, building with foam blocks, sorting shapes and patterns, playing with the interactive tools, and making friends with Zoey's daughter.

One day soon, we'll be heading back into the gallery to visit the Kids' Space again. We might even venture around to some of the other exhibitions. (I know!) The National Gallery of Victoria has some children's activities available for older kids, but I might tailor some of those to Abbey's age - things like drawing pictures of the paintings, talking about colours and objects.

It all just goes to show that non-traditional children's activities are sometimes the best.

Love

No matter how down I am, talking to him always makes me feel better.

He can always make me laugh. Even when I don't want to.

He's the one.

The best husband, the best dad.

Love.

Food - the story of a culture

Ask me about many of the places I've travelled to and I'll probably resort to photos to jog my memory. But ask me about the food and, well, let's just say that a stomach never forgets.

From the good (most of the places I've been, really!) to the bad (hello London), food tells you a lot about a culture.

This week I was fortunate enough to attend a blogging dinner at a Malaysian restaurant in Melbourne. Why? Because I'm a blogger ambassador for Malaysia Kitchen, a campaign to promote Malaysian food in Australia.

I dined with the lovely ladies from Ogilvy PR and other bloggers Karen, Christine, Jolie, Carly and Candice.

LaksaMe is one of those little hidden treasures that Melbourne is famous for. Tucked in an unassuming laneway, a quiet spot despite its position off one of the busiest streets, it's sitting there just waiting to be found.

And the food was delicious. I thought that perhaps I had unknowingly tried Malaysian at some point, but I think not. It's spicier than I expected (note to self: ask for mild dishes!), and the traditional flavours used in original and modern ways was a perfect fit. Head chef, Allan Woo, spoke to us about the different spices used and how he created the dishes we had eaten.

Food is more than sustenance, it is a story of a culture, and hearing someone's take on that story is always intriguing.

Now, my role as an ambassador involves going out for Malaysian meals a few more times. (Tough gig, this.) Look out for more posts on the hidden treasure that is Malaysian cuisine.

What's happening at our place...

When I decided to reduce my daughter's childcare hours, I thought I should step up and give her some more activities to do at home.

It's freezing cold here right now, so indoor activities are the necessity (mixed with a brisk walk or trike ride here and there!).

This last week, we've been doing lots of...

Necklace-making

Crafting

Baking

Playing

What's been happening at your place this week?

My kind of toy shopping

Let's talk toys.

In the last couple of years, I've taken to shopping at mid-year toy sales to reduce (and spread out) the cost of Christmas, and birthdays that fall in the second half of the year. But, oh the horror of the toy sales. The crowds! Scouring the shelves for the good stuff! The other bargain-hungry parents fighting each other! I'm exhausted just thinking about it (she says as she has a sip of wine to calm the nerves).

However, the Target toy sale has a great system this year. They've included an online lay-by feature - look through the catalogue online, make a list on their website, then just go into a store within two weeks to pay a deposit and activate the lay-by. That's it. Someone else scours the shelves for you.

So, instead of this post being about trawling through the sales, fighting the other parents for that last must-have item on the shelf... it's about this:

Christmas shopping? Well and truly under way, with four of my nieces and nephews now ticked off my list. All while sitting on my couch, sipping on a glass of red wine - now that's my kind of toy shopping.


[Disclaimer: I received a Target voucher from Product Talk by Nuffnang in order to write about the toy sale. Lucky me!]

Today, I knew.

Today.

I want to write about today, because it meant something.

Today I knew.

I drove, the excitement at seeing her bringing tears to my eyes.

I finally admitted it: I've missed her on these long days.

More than that, I know now that I love this.

I tried to fight it for so long, thinking I should be more.

But I shouldn't.

This, right here, is it.

Today, I walked, with her small hand in mine.

We talked, laughed, we looked at the world and its people.

("What's her name, Mummy?" "I don't know." "We should ask her.")

I listened.

("The postie didn't wave to me, Mummy. Now I feel sad.")

That cloudy feeling, it lingered in my head for longer than I cared to admit.

It hid me.

I've missed my little girl.

I missed me, too.

Today, though, I knew.

I'm better.

I knew, and I smiled. I breathed.

How to cut living costs: the food edition

In this household, we're big believers in saving before buying.

Right now, we're saving for a few things. Being on one income, it can be really hard to save, so we've been looking at ways we can cut our living costs - and I thought I'd share some of them. We're trying to be a bit creative in how we free up some money, so I'd love your ideas and tips too.

First up - food costs. Here are some things we already do, and some we are going to start with:

We keep the grocery shopping bill down by buying fresh fruit and vegetables from a local supplier, rather than the supermarkets. They're cheaper and they last a lot longer, which means we throw out a lot less of anything.

Further reduce the weekly food bill by buying meat in bulk - we've done this for a while now, and it's great. We get a quarter of a cow and a whole lamb (all chopped and packaged in portions, and delivered to us) direct from a farm and it costs us around $300 to $400 all up - we usually do that twice a year, a big saving for a meat-loving family! We now also get chicken from the same farm and it's much cheaper too - and all the meat is really, really, REALLY good. And fresh. Doing this also means we get to eat nice things, like cutlets and roasts and steaks, which we'd rarely do if I had to buy it from the butcher or supermarket each week.

We seem to be in the habit of going out for lunch every Sunday... which is getting very expensive! And while it's fun (and I keep convincing myself it's educational - teaching Abbey how to behave in restaurants) it isn't a luxury that single income-earners or those saving up for big things can really afford. Not every week. We're now changing our lunches out to cheaper or free family activities with either lunch at home or a pre-prepared picnic. Meals out will be relegated back to less frequent occasions and times we really, really want to go somewhere (a restaurant we've been wanting to try, or a special occasion).

Bake. And then bake some more. The key to low-cost eating (and healthier eating) is making as much as possible at home - there is just no escaping that fact. Set times for baking - meals, treats, breads and pastas (if you enjoy it like I do) - and freeze some too. Having as much on hand as possible during busy times of the week will save stopping for quick and expensive takeaway, or boring yourself with the same meals all the time. (That's a key for us too - keeping food interesting. We like good food and don't want to eat boring, bland meals... and that takes a bit of thought and preparation.)

Be prepared. I tend to fork out ridiculous amounts for snacks when I'm out and suddenly starving, or caught without something for Abbey (toddlers always need snacks!). Usually it's just a matter of taking two minutes to throw some snacks in a container before we head out the door - sultanas or cheese and biscuits, fruit or a baked treat, are easy and always on hand.

Drinks. I drink lots of water, and being out for a few hours without a drink on hand can make me feel a bit yuck. Kids also need lots of fluids. So, always - always! - have a bottle of water with you. I loathe paying for water, especially given that here in Melbourne we have some of the best tap water in the world.

On the topic of drinks.... let's talk alcohol. Steve and I are not ones to drink just anything - we're somewhat snobby fussy when it comes to beer (for him), wine (for us both), and champagne (for me). We justify the occasional splurge by having a smaller shopping bill in general, and we just drink less due to our expensive tastes (we'd rather drink good stuff less frequently, than drinks we don't enjoy all the time). (This is a good thing for our health, too, so it's a good control!)

I've saved the most important tip for last: meal planning. If you're serious about wanting to spend less at the supermarket, or wanting less wastage, then a good meal plan is the key to it all. Think about: which ingredients you'll need for certain dishes (if one dish uses half a tub of natural yoghurt, for example, try to plan another meal that will use the other half - or make double and freeze it); writing a shopping list and sticking to it; what you'll need for all meals and snacks, not just dinner; avoiding extra trips to the shops in between big shopping trips (firstly because food shopping is boring! and secondly because more trips will tempt you to buy more things while you're there); and using leftovers either to freeze or to eat as another meal.

In case you think all this cost-cutting sounds terribly boring (and tight!), let me assure you that sacrificing a few things doesn't have to mean going without all the time. There are times in our lives when we simply can't afford everything, so we have to choose. If going without a few small things means we get a family weekend away, or something else to help finish the house, then to us it's worth it.

Next time, we'll talk about cutting household bills. 

How about you: do you do any of these things already, or do you have some extra tips for us?

Dear ride on mower...

Dear ride on mower,

Oh you're too funny.

My husband often wishes he had a ride on mower to tackle our backyard and its untamed grass. I wonder what he'd say if I bought you for him?

Yours in laughter,

Megan

Time to make some changes

When you put your child into childcare (creche, daycare, whatever term you want to use), you place a lot of trust and responsibility in people who are relative strangers. Strangers with qualifications, sure, but strangers nonetheless.

They may know the 'right' things to do, text-book style, and they may or may not have raised their own children or have kids in their lives, but they have no idea how we do things in our family.

I chose my daughter's childcare, where she has been attending twice a week for the last eight months, based on one thing: gut instinct. Places close to our house had my instinct screaming NO, so I found this little spot a bit out of the way and Abbey has been happy there. The people are lovely, the place is nice, and all is good.

The staff at my daughter's childcare centre recently asked for some photos of the kids, photos of them with special people in their lives or doing things they love, photos that will remind them of those things during the day. I gave them four: Abbey with Steve and I, with a cousin, at the fire station and with her beloved teddy bear.

We explained each of the photos to the ladies at the centre. It struck me as odd, that Abbey spends two full days each week with these people and they have no idea of the love she has for her teddy bear - that this is the one place she will go without him - no idea that her cousins are some of her favourite people in the world.

My little girl is only two, almost three, and these things and people are her life. It feels odd to have her life split into two like this.

Every childcare centre has policies and ways of doing things - many of these regulated, some specific to each centre, or to each staff member's manner. One thing I've struggled with recently is television. I'm strict with how much TV Abbey watches and which shows she sees, so I was a little shocked to realise she knows some programs I've never shown her. I know, that doesn't seem like a bad thing - but being at the shops and being asked for brand-name, character-based products - and annoying ones at that! - by a two-year-old seems wrong to me. It's life these days I guess, but not in our little world.

Parents are parents, and we decide how our child is raised. But we place a lot of trust in others to help us do this, and by doing that we give up a lot of control over what they're doing, how they're disciplined, what they eat and see, who they spend time with.

The things I've mentioned - the TV, the not knowing her teddy bear - are not big issues. They do not turn me against childcare or make me want to take her out of the centre. They are just life, part of a child being out of their home environment. Abbey has a lot of fun at childcare, she learns a lot and does many activities that she doesn't get to do at home.

What these are, are realisations that give me what I believe is a healthy dose of wariness, and the knowledge that no decision is made without its sacrifices.

The last eight months of childcare have, quite simply, got me through. After reaching rock bottom last year, I needed some time - to write, to work from home, to try some things (some of which have worked out, some haven't).

Now, though, it's time to make some changes. I am cutting back Abbey's hours, trying her with half-days instead of full days, easing her back in preparation for preschool next year. She and I, we're going to spend more time together again, and I'm going to fit everything else around that.

It's time to do things our way.

The other me

Two versions of me?

Firstly, I'd pity my husband and daughter. Two wives sounds like a lot of work, and two mums - well, an adventuring toddler wouldn't be able to get away with anything.

Except that maybe if there was another me, I'd do something else entirely.

I might be far away, living a life for others, doing great things. I might be able to sacrifice some personal wishes for the sake of others.

ActionAid have recently launched their latest campaign, The Other You, which caters to all those who believe that there’s another you who, given the time, would do more to fight injustice.

The Other You connects people who want to fight injustice with amazing activists overseas who are doing just that. Through the campaign, you can help ActionAid activists on the ground in Australia, Cambodia, Zimbabwe, Kenya, Uganda and Bangladesh fight poverty and prejudice, and help protect people’s basic rights. Through a small monthly donation the campaign gives us the chance to do more of the great work they’re already doing – the work that, given the time and opportunity, you would like to do.

This video explains it all:






At the heart of their work is the belief that every person has a right to food, shelter, work, education, health care and democratic governance. Help them by heading to The Other You's website and donating.

What would you do if there was another you?

[Disclaimer: I have written this post to help promote a good cause. No compensation has been received for this.]

Move along, we don't want you here

A certain fast-food giant has recently submitted an application to build a store (I refuse to use the word 'restaurant') here in the hills.

Until now, the worst food we have up here is a restaurant that serves a children's meal of pancakes with chips, and a smorgasbord spot that is tacky but very popular with tourists. Apart from the usual local fish and chip shops and pizzerias, that's as bad as it gets.

Most of us around here are opposed to fast-food outlets coming into our community, and this company has been refused before, years ago - but it's worth trying again in a different location, I guess. Not to mention hoping to appeal to a modern time-poor community.

There are a lot of reasons for us to object to their application - traffic issues, litter, noise, location issues, health issues, blah blah blah.

For Steve and I, it's more selfish personal than that. We bought our house ten and a half years ago, undertook major renovations last year, and intend to live here forever - yet, if this chain moves in, we'll consider moving. That's how opposed we are to their proposal.

Why?

Because of the smell that will no doubt permeate the air (the beautiful fresh air, a big calling card for people who live up here).

Because the planned location is right by a school and a preschool - and the kids who attend them shouldn't see the big logo every time they play in their playground.

Because wherever we drive, with our child in the backseat looking outside keenly, and whenever we walk in that direction, Abbey will see it and possibly ask to eat it. (As yet, she has no idea what those places are... other than toilet stops... but this won't last forever.) Sure, we can - and will - say no, but why put the temptation there in the first place? Why make this crap part of our kids' lives?

The stuff they sell has little to no nutritional value, and we refuse to feed it to our daughter.

Sure, we're all struggling for time these days and fast food is a big temptation to many (and although I don't eat this brand, I'm certainly not immune to those tempations with other fast food). Sure, these stores are located in thousands of communities around the world. But I believe this type of food has no place in our lives these days (don't we realise by now that food can be quick and still better than that?), let alone here in the hills.

And I love that the objectors have started a Facebook page to gather together not just the locals, but others who can put forward their objections too. The power of the people, 2011 style - let's hope it works.

Bake: Homemade English Muffins

I tried these muffins as a little experiment. We tend to go through English Muffins quite quickly here - Abbey has a newfound love for them, and we do love to eat them with fresh poached eggs. Yum.

So, I made a batch - and was so impressed with them that I'll be making double batches regularly from now on. No more buying them from the supermarket.

Once cooked as per the instructions below, you can freeze them as use them as needed just like you would with the bought product. Chop in half and toast or grill.

Homemade English Muffins

350ml (12fl oz) milk
2 teaspoons caster sugar
7g (1/4oz) sachet fast-acting yeast

500g (1lb 2oz) bakers flour

1 teaspoon salt

Flour, extra for dusting

Heat the milk, stir in the sugar and yeast. Stand for 5 minutes or until the mixture is frothy.
Sift the flour and salt into a large bowl.
Pour most of the liquid into the dry ingredients and mix to a soft but not wet dough.
Knead for 6 to 8 minutes by hand, until the dough is smooth and slightly springy.
Place the dough in an oiled bowl, cover and leave in a warm place for about 1 hour or until it has doubled in size.
Knock back the risen dough and knead again for 2 to 3 minutes, then leave on a dusted work bench covered with an upturned bowl or tea towel for a further 30 minutes.
Without knocking back the dough, roll it into a log about 20cm long. Cut the log into 10 slices, each about 2cm thick, and place on a baking tray dusted with flour, cut side down.
Dust the top with flour, then flatten them slightly so they are about 1.5cm thick.
Cover with a tea towel and leave to rise for 30 minutes.
Place a frying pan or grill pan on a medium heat. When the pan is moderately hot, reduce the heat to very low and cook the muffins (using no oil or butter) in batches for 10 minutes on each side. When they are cooked they will be golden brown on both sides and will sound hollow when tapped on the base.
Wrap cooked muffins in a clean tea towel.
Cooked, cooled muffins are freezable.

Enjoy!

People, numbers & the game of blogging

It's hard not to get sidetracked and turn blogging into a numbers business, rather than a people game.

This week, I was mentioned as one of Blogger's Blogs of Note - pretty cool, really. Except that the after effects are unnerving me a little.

In the last two days, the number of visits to my blog has doubled. The number of followers has doubled. Comments are coming through faster than ever.

But as I notice new visitors looking back over some older posts, I realise once again all the things I've written here. Things that I've never minded people reading - when those people were mostly people I knew or was likely to chat with on Twitter or meet at blogging events.

I know, I'm writing on the internet and I should be aware of this stuff, but it still felt small.

I guess the biggest thing that worries me here is that line between sharing about myself and writing about my daughter. My blog was always intended to be about me, with Abbey only coming into my writing as I talked about parenting. That is, my experiences in parenting rather than her story, her childhood.

It crosses your mind, the whole thing of putting your child up on the internet. It's like sending her out into the world - communities are wonderful and you can trust the great majority of them and you like to look on that positive side. Then there's that big 'but' that hangs in the air.

I want this to remain a space to write, to write whatever, and feel comfortable doing so. I want my blog to have that same small feel, yet still grow with my writing and my profile. I want to keep the same readers, the friends who come here and join in a conversation just as I do on many of their blogs.

Maybe this is just my fifteen minutes of attention and things will calm down soon.

Maybe the answer is to ignore the numbers and just do what I've always done.

This is a bit of a rambling post - sorry about that. I'm not sure if I'm talking more about numbers versus community, or staying true to yourself and your audience, or the big issue of children's privacy. It's all floating around my head at the moment.

Who knew this blogging caper could be so confusing?

PS - to new readers, welcome to the confusion that is my brain! ;)

My happy hair (+ Giveaway)

Something small can have a big impact on your day-to-day life.

I have, um, interesting skin. And the state of my skin will affect how comfortable I am, how well I sleep, and how pleasant I am to be around.

Using something on my skin that irritates it can make my life miserable. It's that simple - and that difficult.

My head is the hardest of all to please. The psoriasis on my scalp (something I don't very often admit to having - it's quite embarrassing!) can at worst be tight and constantly itchy and sore, and at best just dry.

I spent a couple of years using tar ointments, cortisone creams and medicated shampoos in an effort to get rid of it - all of which left my skin worse than ever and my hair in a shocking state. It's one of the reasons I kept my hair so short for so many years - it's hard to have long hair when you have handfuls of it falling out every time you shower.

In the end I decided that if none of that was making my skin condition any better, I might as well focus on just soothing it. And having nicer hair.

And so I'm back to using normal shampoos - Pantene being my recent brand of choice. My skin is fine with it and it makes my hair look shiny and smooth, and it's helped build up the strength of my hair again.

All was travelling along well - until I received an email about Pantene's latest product. I tried it and.... WOW! I've honestly never been this stunned by a shampoo in my life.

My skin is better than it has been in years*. My hair is better than it has been in years.

Here it is:

Yes, three products. Shampoo, conditioner and an 'Intensive Penetrating Treatment'. I had never used a third treatment product in my hair until now, and would have overlooked it on the supermarket shelves, but it was a big factor in getting my hair back to lovely - so I'm glad I had the chance to give it a shot.

I'll definitely keep using the Pantene Nature Fusion products!

*

WIN one of three Pantene one-week trial kits.

1. Fullness-charge Revitalising - for thin hair.
2. Micro-repair Revitalising - for chemically damaged hair.
3. Hydro-surge Revitalising - for dry and frizzy hair.

(These are not from the Nature Fusion range, but are a good sample of the Pantene brand.)

To enter, simply leave a comment telling me which one you'd like to win (1, 2 or 3).

Australian residents only. Giveaway ends at 5pm Sunday 17th July 2011 (AEST). Good luck!

*

* Just a little note that this is not a product for psoriasis or other skin conditions - this is just my experience with my very strange skin!

[Disclaimer: I was sent samples of these products to try, and I have chosen to blog about them due to my positive experience. I was not paid to write this post, and the glowing opinion is entirely my own. Which of course it would have been even if I'd been paid... but you knew that.]

Write the music

The song that inspired the name of my blog. Not just my blog, but a hope to live more honestly and to get to know myself. It sounds so cliche and silly, but that's what this whole thing was about at the beginning - trying to understand what I wanted from my life. I wanted to write, that I knew. I wanted to be a better mum, wife, person. Beyond that? No idea.

Can a blog do all that? It's a big ask, and the answer is quite simple: no. Whether you write about it or not, confusion is still confusion, and if you're not happy in yourself you won't be happy no matter what else you do. No matter how else you try to disguise it, no matter how much you try to fill your life with things to distract you.

It all sounds so serious, and it is in my own little world. Big picture? No, it's silly and small and insignificant. The truth is I'm still looking for the answers, for that one thing to click into place that makes me go, 'Aha!'

I've learnt that I'm not the mum I thought I'd be (I mean that in a good way!), I'm not the writer I thought I'd be, not the person I imagined my whole life. I guess I'm figuring out how to drop the expectations and just... be.

Does the blog fix it all? No. But it does add a wonderful something into my life.

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This is a writing exercise for InkPaperPen's Write On Wednesdays - click the button below to read the other participants' pieces.

Balloon parenting

Our parenting style often raises some eyebrows. Because as much as people are angered that apparently kids don't climb trees anymore, they actually freak out when they see a child doing just that. (Luckily, Abbey can practice in our backyard!)

I often have other parents rushing over to me at parks - "Is that your daughter? She fell over!" - and while I appreciate their concern, I simply say thanks and tell them she's fine. (What I mean is, when she falls and gets up and dusts herself off before continuing to play. Of course I help her if it's more serious than that!)

We like to operate on two theories in this instance: firstly, that kids bounce off their parents' reactions so if we act calmly so does Abbey; secondly, just have fun! Climb, run, play, fall, keep playing.

Steve and I are most definitely not 'helicopter parents'. Nor are we 'free range parents' - we like to keep a good eye on Abbey, just without her knowing we are. (And I think other parents think we're not watching either - we're stealthy like that.)

We're somewhere in between, and perhaps a term like 'balloon parents' would be more suitable: always there somewhere, only just in view, floating in closely for a few minutes here and there before venturing into the background again.

That's us.

There is not one parenting style that suits all, but this is right for us and for Abbey.

TV time and a new 'non-annoying' show

I'm very, very picky about what my 2.5 year-old daughter, Abbey, watches on TV.

There are specific criteria for shows I approve for her: there must be some educational element, definitely no presenters who 'talk down' to kids, and very importantly it must not be too annoying for me (which rules out a lot!).

I haven't tried to find too many shows, though, as we also have strict limits on TV time (she can watch one show or, on occasion, one movie per day - maximum).

And so we haven't come across the CBeebies channel - until now.

The second series of the new CBeebies show, Get Squiggling, was a hit with Abbey. Squiglet lives in a white world, but it doesn't stay that way for long. He draws lots of pictures, which come to life and make life fun, with a new character in each episode.

The show features a combination of animation, and real children (in different segments), talking and singing, which keeps kids interested and learning. Learning? I hear you ask. How? Squiglet's drawings come in the form of mini-tutorials, explaining how to draw various simple shapes and lines. Along the way, they encourage viewers (it's aimed at preschool age children) to grab some paper and 'squiggle sticks' (pencils) and join in - a great way to use television as a more interactive form of entertainment.

Abbey did just that:

Abbey drew her way through each show, thrilled with herself at each effort.

And I'm happy to have found another show that's high quality and geared thoughtfully towards her age group. Best of all, it meets all my criteria - educational, smart, 'non-annoying', and short.

It's a win/win really.

Get Squiggling will air on the Foxtel/Austar CBeebies channel on weekdays at 8.30am, from July 4. Find out more on their website.

Are you a CBeebies fan? What's your favourite show of theirs? If not, what shows do and don't you allow your kids to watch?

[Disclaimer - I am being paid by Kidspot to write this post in order to promote CBeebies Get Squiggling. However, my views are not bought - everything I have written is my own opinion.]

"Write about me, Mummy"

I hit 'New Post' and sit staring at the flashing cursor.

"What should I write about?" I ask Abbey, who's sitting next to me.

She answers without hesitation. "Me!"

So I do.

Yesterday, Abbey was 34 months. Just two short months from turning three. Three.

Although I'm ridiculously soppy in some ways - I'll cry at anything on television, happy or sad, real or not - I'm not when it comes to Abbey growing up. I watch each stage with pride, and Steve and I will brag about her new learnings at any opportunity.

Coming up to three sees lots of changes. She no longer fits in her baby carseat, she does swimming lessons without me in the pool, she will no longer be classed as a toddler, we have to start thinking about preschool. When will we send her? (In Victoria, it's optional to go to three-year-old kindergarten.) Where will we send her? And those kinds of thoughts lead to schools. I guess we're lucky where we live - we don't have to make any real decisions until the last minute; there isn't a problem with availability up here.

She, of course, can't wait. "I'll be a kinder kid soon!" she declares, on a daily basis.

"What happens when you're a kinder kid?" I ask her.

"I go to the big kids' side!" she says excitedly, referring to the setup at the childcare centre she attends twice a week. Whether she stays there and goes to "the big kids' side" or heads to a preschool instead is yet to be decided. I do know that whichever place she goes, she'll be happy. She's that kind of kid.

She takes it further still. "I'll go to school one day," she tells me several times each day. "I will. And Daddy will take me and he'll pick me up too."

To Abbey, the world is a fun and exciting place. She has no worries, no fears, and a love of life just for life's sake.

I love that.

And although I can't wait to see her grow up, to watch her keep learning, to give her love through all the years ahead - I will her to stop wishing the time away.

Just stay in the moment, munchkin.

She's sick of me writing about her now - "Mummy, come and play with me!"

So I do.

The Teddy Bear Chronicles

Abbey has two things she won't sleep without: her dummy (we've tried getting rid of it, but the idea upsets her so much we think she needs to keep it a while longer - with the strict rule we've always had, which is that it's for bedtime only) and her teddy bear.

She has a lot of soft toys. So many that we have some on display in her room, and the rest taking up most of the top of her double wardrobes and stored under the house. Yes, I know. All of them were gifts, and so we've had to put a ban on soft toy presents.

One, given to her by her grandparents (Steve's parents, who incidentally are responsible for 95% of her soft toy collection), was quickly named Frosty because of his hat, scarf and mittens. And from the moment she first cuddled him, Abbey loved Frosty ("Otty").

There are a few signs, though, that teddy bear love might have gone a little far. And that as parents, we might be taking his place in our family a little too seriously. Things like...

• Panicking when he is lost near bedtime, resulting in a full-scale search throughout the house and its perimeter.
• Holding conversations with our daughter via Frosty.
• Using him to communicate things we want Abbey to do (actually, this one works quite well!).
• Thinking a request for him to sit on my lap and 'drive the car' is reasonable, and playing along as he talks and sings with Abbey whilst keeping his eyes on the road and his hands upon the wheel. (What have I become?)
• When Abbey hit him recently, I disciplined her for it. (I then had to hide to laugh at myself.)
• Having to quickly wash and dry him in a day, without Abbey seeing, after taking him camping and bringing him home a new brown colour.
• Taking him everywhere - to the shops, out walking, to the park.

I have a feeling that Abbey will always love this special little bear, and cherish the memories of him being part of her childhood.

Which makes all the craziness worthwhile.

Confessions of a skin sinner (+ Giveaway!)

When it comes to skin routines, I'm bad. Leave-my-makeup-on-all-night-because-I-just-can't-be-bothered kind of bad - and that's the number one absolute skin sin.

Not to mention being a lovely sight to wake up next to the following morning. Panda eyes? Check. Red, irritated eyes from bits of makeup getting in? Check. Blotchy, dry skin? Check.

Oh yes, it's very glamorous.

To be completely honest, it's only very recently that I even formed a skin 'routine'. What can I say? I was late to the wearing makeup thing, and even later to the taking it off thing. Now, I'm a cleanse, tone and moisturise twice a day kinda girl - whether I've worn makeup (rare these days) or not - and I always regret it when I don't stick to the routine. The difference in my skin is incredible, especially seeing as I naturally have very dry skin.

When I was asked to trial Dove's new Foaming Make-up Remover, I was a little wary. I'm into very basic skincare, so if cleansing requires too many steps I consider it too hard. Serums? Different products for eyes? It just won't happen.

This product is pretty cool - it foams up and it left my skin feeling really refreshed and hydrated (a big ask of my skin). It's a one-step product (yay!), able to be used for eye makeup as well as the rest of the face, and it removed it all really easily - no scrubbing my eyes to get remnants of mascara or eyeliner off.

Having said that, it did sting my eyes so I'd recommend being pretty careful with it around that area.

All in all, it's good - and reasonably priced, which is also a big thing for me. I'll keep using it.

What's your biggest skin sin? The best comment will win a $25 Coles Myer voucher*!

* Giveaway ends at 5pm AEST on Sunday 10th July. Only open to Australian residents. Best comment will be judged by me.

[Disclaimer - I am being paid by Kidspot to write this post in order to review Dove Foaming Make-up Remover. However, my views are not bought - everything I have written is my own opinion.]

Notes from a partially-reformed Daydreamer

"Mummy? Mummy? Mum? Mummy! Muuuum! MUM!"

"Megan? Did you hear what I said?" (I nod.) (Five second delay.) (Then I shake my head.)

"Megan is a good student but needs to pay a little more attention in class."

"Did you do the minutes of that meeting?" (I answer affirmatively.) (I then seek out another attendee to fill in the blanks of my notes.)

*

I'm a daydreamer.

As a child, a teenager, an adult, a professional, a mum, a wife - I've spent my life living half in this world and half in one of my own.

Of course, this has its hindrances.

It's frustrating for others who think I'm there with them, when I'm really only there physically. Many times each day someone will attempt a conversation with me and I'll have to pretend I was listening to the beginning of the story. Steve will talk about something that was just on television, something we're both watching, and I'll have no idea what he's talking about. My eyes are looking at the screen but my ears are switched off and my thoughts are far, far away.

(Sometimes I wonder if this is why my memory seems so bad - I remember the things I was there for, but when my mind switches over that's the end of any chance of remembering that moment/book/movie.)

I've had to be very conscious of this recently. Someone spoke to me about Mindfulness, and I realised that's what I needed to practice - being fully present when I'm with others or even by myself at times. If I'm playing with my daughter, I need to be there playing with her. If I'm eating a meal with my family, I need to just be there.

It's helped with my state of mind, making me happier in my reality rather than escaping to dreamland all the time. And it's a bit more satisfying for my husband, daughter and friends; it makes me better able to connect with them, and them with me.

Now, I concentrate on being there. Just being in the moment.

Oh, but I do still daydream. I love that in my writing life, daydreaming is just part of the job description. Staring out the window and dreaming things up is not a distraction; it's a necessity. And perhaps it is that, the permission I give myself to drift away at times, that frees me up the rest of the time.

I love to daydream, to see where my mind takes me. I just do it a little less often these days.

Dear Google Maps...

Dear Google Maps,

I see that the tech nerds have a sense of humour these days. These are the directions you give from Australia to America. You cheeky scoundrels, you.

Kayak 5,404 kms and then turn right? Oh, stop it. You had me at 'kayak'.

Thanks for the laugh, Google.

Yours in kayak training,

Megan

Bake: Apple and Berry Crumble

My preferred method of eating fruit is by way of desserts, and there's no better winter fruit dessert than a good old crumble!

Here's the well-tested recipe I use:

Apple and Berry Crumble

7 green apples, cored and chopped
1 cup fresh berries (I usually use blackberries, but you can also use blueberries or raspberries - or no berries at all)
1/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon lemon rind, finely grated
2 teaspoons lemon juice

Preheat the oven to 180°C. Place the apples, berries, sugar, lemon rind and juice in an ovenproof dish and stir to combine. Set aside.

Crumble
1 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup plain flour
75g butter, softened
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Place the rolled oats, sugar, flour, butter and cinnamon in a bowl and mix to combine. Spoon the oat mixture over the fruit and bake for 50 minutes or until the topping is golden and crisp and the apple is soft.

Enjoy!

Short fiction - Write on Wednesday

"I can't stress how important it is that we behead this fiend."

"WTF dude???????"

"I can't stress how important it is that we believe this friend. Bloody auto correct LOL"

The messages flew between the two men, and Ben couldn't help but show the error to his wife. "It sounds like one of my books!" she laughed. "Henry the eighth beheading the enemy. Usually a wife."

Ben looked at her with a cunning grin and she threw a cushion at him. "You're an idiot," she laughed as he threw it back at her. He moved closer and kissed her, the pair still laughing at first, before giving in to the passion of the moment.

As his phone beeped twice more in the background, Ben couldn't help but think of his friend. The situation was complicated, and he didn't like complications with friendships. He reached over and silenced his phone, turning his full attention to his wife.

"I won't behead you," he muttered, making her laugh again. "I'll do lots of other things to you, though..."

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This is a writing exercise for InkPaperPen's Write On Wednesdays - click the button below to read the other participants' pieces.