Darling Abbey,
Three-and-a-half years ago you were born, and I became a Mum.
By the time my first Mothers Day came around, your Dad and I had discussed how we felt about Mothers and Fathers Days. Quite simply, we were as impressed with the idea of those as we were about Valentine's Day. (Yuck.) And so, each time a Mothers or Fathers Day has arrived we ignore them - except to visit your grandparents. Maybe. If we're feeling charitable enough to ignore the fact we don't like these days and would prefer to (and do) visit them at other unscheduled times.
Last year at childcare you made me a glittery wooden spoon and a card. This year at kinder, I'm pretty sure you're making me a card that tells me what you love about me. (You haven't yet learnt to keep a secret.) (For the record, you love that I read you stories.)
I love that stuff - making a nice card or a funny little offering, not buying me stuff that ads on TV tell you I want. (If I want diamonds I'll hint to your Dad for another occasion.) But I love it no more than any other day you come home armed with paintings and paper plates that you've scrawled your name over, or a picture that you say is of the three of us with big smiles on our faces.
One day when you're older you might want to buy me something small, or make me breakfast, or pick some flowers from our garden for me. But whether you do those things on Mothers Day or on any other random day doesn't matter to me. Frankly, whether you do those things at all is neither here nor there.
What I want is for you to love the people in your life, and to show them that. And show them whenever the urge takes you, not when a date on a calendar tells you to.
You are one of the most genuine, kind people I know - and I don't want that turned into a fake, forced showing of affection by the commercial world. Just be you. Show your love in a way that's you. If you grow up to really love those days and feel that helps you express your affection, then do it - but do it for your own reasons.
In our family we'll celebrate Christmas and birthdays with love and excitement. The rest of the year, let's just give life the chance to happen, and enjoy the hell out of it.
Love you.
Mum
Good morning Megan! This is a great post. I agree with the previous commenter totally. I also agree with you, especially about Valentine's Day. But I do like the idea of mother's day in general - there are a lot of mums out there who unfortunately do get forgotten, who are taken for granted... so if this is a day that makes their kids or partners remember them and the effort they put in, then that's a good thing. In general.
ReplyDeletePersonally? We don't really celebrate any of these days ourselves - a wish, a cuddle and that's about it for us! I do know my mum loves that we all call her and wish her a happy mothers day - after five kids she's had her fair share of highs and lows! I really don't know how she did it.
You live every day to the full, which is such an inspiration. And I hope you enjoy your card :)
Great post, Megan. I echo your sentiments exactly.
ReplyDeleteShe won't go from generous and caring to fake and materialistic... not with her nature and the foundations you and her Dad are laying out for her. We have a similar view - of Valentines Day too - and really just have a bit of a nice day together as a family, none of this scrambling to the shops to buy the latest "whatever" is deemed a Mothers/Fathers Day must-have. In fact, we avoid all that at all costs! x
Gorgeous Megan. For mothers day each year I go to the beach with my boys and they find me a shell, that's the only thing i ask of them. I have a growing collection of them now, and I tell them that even when they're grown men, I just want them to send me a shell from wherever they are. Nothing else. It is what you make it. And I love your attitude to what makes life special with your little girl.
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful! Your girl is a lucky one!
ReplyDeleteLove it.
ReplyDeleteLove heartfelt, handmade.
Can't stand the commercialism.
:-) x
Yes, yes, yes! I make a fuss of my mum cos of historical reasons in wanting to make the boys in my family do something nice to show their appreciation but she is in no doubt that I love her every day of the year. Abbey will understand these things. In fact I am sure she already would cos I know Bebito does. I just totally detest the over commercialisation of all these days. I love your sparkly spoon by the way! X
ReplyDeleteLovely letter to your little girl.
ReplyDeleteMother's day is such a non-event here - I even managed to roster myself on to work it before I realised what day it was! ooops.
Yes yes, a million times yes... feel like printing this off for my girls to read as they get caught up in the Mother's Day 'stuff' at school
ReplyDelete